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Recipe for a Bad Monday

By M Davies   /     Oct 29, 2007  /     Annoyances, The Myspace Blog File  /     0 Comment
  • Waking up late.
  • Opening Gabby’s door this morning to find she stripped naked and then peed on her floor.
  • Rich not bothering to take out the dog or the yard waste this morning before he left.
  • Having to unload 2 boxes of shit from desk out of my jeep at 7am this morning.
  • The South Main Street traffic fuckage due to the fire over the weekend.
  • Nearly getting into an accident because no one knows the difference between the turning lanes from the straight lanes on South Washington Street.
  • Realizing my tank was on E before even getting out of Wilkes-Barre, then spending 40 dollars to fill it.
  • Driving in and realizing I’m going to have to pack more shit when I get to my desk.  (7 years of personal FX)
  • Finally sitting down at my desk at 9:15am.

Thank god I was able to stop for a coffee at least.  Now screw you guys, I’m going to the gym.

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Gum on my Porch

By M Davies   /     Oct 27, 2007  /     I hate my neighbors, The Myspace Blog File  /     0 Comment

Well I found another piece of gum on my side porch this morning.  I am fuming.  My side porch is situated so that it sits back from the street and facing my neighbors huge wrap around porch.  The gum could only have come from their porch, because it gets no foot traffic from the street.  I highly doubt someone walking by would see my porch and would walk up to it for the sole purpose of spitting out their gum.

The little hellion brats from next door think its acceptable to spit gum and candy and shit on my porch, sidewalks and etc.  Also, the one kid over there that is now in High School smokes, and throws his cigarette butts near my garbage.  I swear to fucking god I am going to have an anuerysm if I have to pick up one more piece of gum or cigarette butt. 

We’ve already talked to the parents a few years ago about the gum problem.  The mother was supposed to talk to the brats about that.  I’m thinking that instead of telling them not to spit gum on our side, she probably told them to keep doing it.  If anything the gum has INCREASED since we mentioned it to her.  What a bitch twat.  Anyway, I don’t think the parents are aware that the High School kid smokes.  Maybe someone should ring the fucking alarm about that one.  Maybe I’ll save up all of the cigarette butts I collect and send them via USPS and write a note that says YOUR SON SMOKES.  Fucking scumbag neighbors.  I hate them one and all.

They are just pissed because we finally fenced in the yard this year.  WELL TOO FUCKING BAD.  Maybe if you weren’t section 8 renters, you wouldn’t have this problem.  PS – you can see the fence pictures in the pictures section of  my Myspace page. 

So here’s what I did – I picked up the piece of gum, and launched it back over onto their side.  I will continue to do this until the madness stops.

I’m going to the hockey game with Russell later.  YAY for getting out of the house for a few hours!  Anyone else going?  Maybe I’ll see you there? 

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Meh.

By M Davies   /     Oct 26, 2007  /     The Myspace Blog File  /     0 Comment

Where I want to be:  In Scranton at the Office Convention

Where I actually am:  Work, for the next 8 hours, with nothing to do because our last day is next Wednesday.

Yeah.  This will be another fun and productive day.  I can tell already.

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The squirrel from hell

By M Davies   /     Oct 25, 2007  /     The Myspace Blog File, The Squirrel Bastard  /     0 Comment

A few weeks ago I ripped out all of my summer flowers that were dying off and replaced them with fall flowers — mainly mums.  As I was digging out the roots and planting the new flowers I came across some weird stuff burried in my potted flowers. 

  • 1 rotten plum
  • 1 peach pit
  • Half a dozen or so cigarette butts (Why would a squirrel think these are food???)
  • A corner of a stale, green partially eaten bagel (EW!)

I really didn’t think anything of it at the time until a few days later there was a huge pile of dirt on my porch.  Then I seen it….a frigging squirrel.  That little bastard has been digging in my potted plants and burrying shit for winter.  Grrrr.  I am like Mr. Fucking Wilson from Dennis the Mennis (Think:  GET OFF MY LAWN YA DAMN KIDS!) when it comes to my landscaping/flowers/garden.  I want it to look perfect and this animal is a thorn in my side.  I pretty much found all of his burried treasures and disposed of them and I thought I had the problem licked.  Wrong.  There was a huge pile of dirt on my porch this morning and I didn’t have the time or patience to sweep it up. 

Does anyone have any HUMANE suggestions how to keep this squirrel from destroying my landscaping?  I was thinking poison fruit, but I don’t want PETA after me.  (Btw – my cousin has a bumper sticker that says PETA “people eating tasty animals”.  that still cracks me up when I think about it) 

Its supposed to rain again tomorrow into Saturday.  The local weathermen say it won’t flood, however…they have not seen the condition of the storm drains in South Wilkes-Barre so I beg to differ. 

Its Thursday, one more day until Friday!  Clean your damn storm drains and give me some decent tips to erradicate this pest with a bushy tail.

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I make sure everything remains raw.

By M Davies   /     Oct 24, 2007  /     The Myspace Blog File  /     0 Comment

I went to the gyno on Monday and apparently now a breast examination done by the doc is part of the yearly check up.  Yeah, I have a female doc, so this made me feel just a tad bit awkward.  Anyway.  The doctor noticed my stomach was sticking out funny and (NO I’M NOT PREGNANT) apparently I have a hernia where my belly button is, which is causing it not to go down properly as it used to.  A hernia.  WTF? 

The doctor said not to worry about it and also eventually that my colon may try to pop through my stomach.  But definately and most importantly do not worry about it.  Um what?  Call me crazy, but that seems a little contradictory to me.  I’ve been researching the shit out of this online.  Clearly I’m going to need to go to my normal family doctor because I have many questions that need to be answered.  Like here’s a good one:  CAN I LIFT HEAVY STUFF?  My son weighs 24 lbs, and daughter weighs 30 something.  Also, I usually have to take out the trash every Tuesday morning, because for some odd reason (even though our Garbage day never has changed since we moved in) my husband never remembers to put it out the night before. 

Also, I have to go for more bloodwork to get my anemia and thyroid checked.  That should be fun because I love bloodwork about as much as watching Dancing with the Stars or watching grass grow.  Actually bloodwork may win that one by a landslide.  I am extremely anemic.  BTW – Anemia means when you are iron defficient – not to be confused with bullemic (which is what my dumbass thought it meant initially).  Anyway, when I was admitted to the hospital to be induced with Owen and they did the standard blood work.  They run a variety of tests to check your blood levels.  I am not sure of the name of the exact test – maybe for iron levels — but the level is supposed to be at 14 for a normal healthy person.  Mine was 7, which is half of what it should be.  I was extremely iron deficient, and needed to get 3 bags of blood.  One I got during the C Section, the next two came in the following days.  I really didn’t feel any different before vs. after the transfusions, but the nurses said my face actually got color back into it.  I also had to get my blood taken like 2 times everyday.  When I was discharged from the hospital my arms were so black and blue people probably thought I was a heroin junkie.  It actually took 2 weeks for the bruising to go away. 

Anyway, I’m going to wrap this up because I have a job interview tomorrow at [company name removed] that I have to mentally prepare for.  Wish me luck.

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Previous Employment Embarrassment

By M Davies   /     Oct 22, 2007  /     NEPA, The Myspace Blog File  /     0 Comment

Since everyone is already aware, because I keep saying it over and over and over like a broken record – I’m losing my job.  Did you know that?  I’m losing my job in 8 days.  I’ll be filing for unemployment in 8 days.  Etc, etc, etc…..

Anyway.

I’ve been filling out all of these jobs apps, going on interviews, and updating my resume.  Back in 1999-2000 (3 months) I worked at a place called Liberty Business Information — LBI for short.  The place was located on Mundy Street near the mall.  I’m not sure of the exact address , but lets just say its on the corner of Highland Park Blvd and Mundy Street.  LBI moved out several years ago, and guess what has moved in….Gentlemans GClub 10.  As in, the BYOB (because we live in Pennsylvania) strip club.  So now, when I’m filling out my job apps I have to put this address as my previous employer, because I don’t know where LBI moved to. 

“Really, Mr. Potential Future Employer, I’m not or was ever a stripper or topless dancer.”

Prior to the Strip Club and LBI, there was also a Chinese Buffet there.  I remember being to the buffet before I worked there.  I think it was called Jolly King Buffet.  When I worked at LBI; my seat used to be somewhere within the kitchen area of the restaurant.  They used to kill cats where I sat.  j/k  Its crazy to think that I worked at LBI before Highland Park Blvd or any of the other retail development/hell up that way existed.  Now there’s a story for the grandkids.  Hey kiddies, check out my Arena Yes bumper sticker and pin. 

Ugh.  I’m showing my age now. 

I’m sick and light headed so I guess I’m gonna go lay down.  And I have to go out to the gyno later.  So that will be a bonus treat in additon to the 85 pounds of snot inside my sinus cavities.

[Edit:  10/28/07]:

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