Medical Issues

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Test Day

By M Davies   /     Oct 03, 2012  /     Medical Issues, Misc/Crap  /     3 Comments

I’m about to leave to go for my Tilt Table Test.  I get fitted with a Holter Monitor later this afternoon.  I’ve had to fast for 4 hours.  I’m nervous, tired, hungry and most importantly, not pleasant to be around at this point.  Sorry world.  I’ll post an update as soon as I have more information.


I’m also planning some BlogCon posts, its just I haven’t been home much since … well…. I actually can’t remember…maybe last week some time?  I’m looking forward to having time off this week, you have no idea.  I have to collect my thoughts about the event and post them.  I’m getting there.  Bare with me peoples.


Wish me luck, or whatever.

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Something is technically wrong

By M Davies   /     Sep 18, 2012  /     Medical Issues  /     0 Comment

I’ve been having these dizzy spells lately and I don’t know why.  I am sure if “dizzy spells” is even the right way to describe it.  Sometimes the room spins, sometimes it doesn’t.  Most of the time I get a head rush and feel like I’m going to pass out.  I wouldn’t even care so much about being dizzy or practically wanting to faint, except now it happens when I drive.  I’ve had 3 separate lightheaded/on the verge of fainting spells while driving.  Two at night and one during the day.


I’ve had several episodes of vasovagal syncope throughout my life and I know what the signs are.  Lightheadedness, feeling warm, feeling disconnected from surroundings, etc.  This is what it feel like.  Like I’m going to die.  In most of the episodes I have experienced with fainting in the past, it usually happens due to getting blood drawn or my body overheating.  I am not doing any of those things when these symptoms come over me.  I’m doing normal things, like driving, standing up and walking and then sitting back down again.


I’ve been to the doctor three times since this has started.  I have a Geisinger doctor who really seems to be a sadist.  The first time I went with the complaint of dizzyness he told me to wait a month and if it was still happening, come back and maybe he’ll do something.  A month?  Are you kidding me?  After having another dizzy spell last Saturday morning combined with the two spells when I was driving in the last week, I called the telenurse who told me not to go to the ER (I was seriously considering going there) and to call my doctor and try to make a Saturday appointment.  I did, and got an appointment for 11:15.  In the event that I needed blood work, I stopped for Breakfast at McD’s.  I’m not a breakfast person, but I do love the breakfast burritos.  I also got a large orange juice.  In my past experiences, If I drink a large sugary drink such as OJ or Gatorade, I do better with blood work.


I ended up getting an order for blood work, but not for that day.  I had to make an appointment the following week.  I did get an EKG from the doctor on duty.  It came back abnormal and was sent to a cardiologist for review.  Props to the weekend doctor on duty for actually giving a damn about my condition.


I called and made an appointment for Monday morning for the blood work and to follow up with my normal doctor.  The blood work (4 different tests) all came back with normal results.  I repeated the EKG, again, the results came back abnormal again.  I also had very low blood pressure – 94 over whatever.  The doctor then requested I go for a bunch of follow up tests including a tilt table test and getting fitted with a holter heart monitor.  However, the doctor told me “do not drive until this gets resolved”.  I’m not really sure what that means.  2 weeks ago, he told me to wait and see for a month.  Now he doesn’t want me driving for another month until the tests are performed which is October 3rd, btw.  This is not possible.  I have school, events to plan, kids to get on the bus, work to commute to and I live in the sticks.  It’s not like I can just hitch a bus or a cab to where I need to go.


I don’t know what is wrong with me, but something isn’t quite right.  I think my body is broken.


Anyway, I’d appreciate some good karma thrown my way if you have any you can share.

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Why god? Why?

By M Davies   /     Apr 02, 2012  /     Medical Issues, The WTF File  /     0 Comment

Remember my dental fiasco over the summer?  Welp.  If you don't, head on over and read the post and I'll wait here until you come back.


Glad to see you're back.  Yeah, that tooth is infected….AGAIN.  Driving home after the Scranton Story Slam on Saturday night, I noticed that the left side of my mouth was extremely sore.  The pain reminded me of having a clenched jaw or grinding your teeth.  I didn't think it was a cavity or anything like that.  I immediately started to wonder if I should have Doc Hollywood paged to see if I could get some pain medications.  Something did not feel right.  I decided to take some Advil when I got home (it was 11:00ish when I got back to Sweet Valley) and hoped that it would clear up overnight. 

The Advil did absolutely nothing for the pain and it was more intense the next morning.  I decided that I better not fuck around with it, and had the dentist paged.  He prescribed me Tylenol 3 (with codeine) and Amoxicillin.  I am allergic to sulfa drugs (Bactrim) so I can't have any of the stronger antibiotics or I can get really sick.  Rich went and picked up the medications for me at CVS after they were called in… and I took them, but I was still feeling pretty sore.  Chewing was a problem, so the only thing I ate yesterday was soup. 

The dentist's office called me this morning and asked if I could come in for 2:30.  I checked with my boss who was ok with it, so I planned to leave around noonish.  A few minutes later, the dentist told me that something earlier opened up and they wanted to know if I could leave right then.  I checked with my boss again and he said no problem.  I left and took everything with me…I wasn't sure if I'd be back or not.  In the car, I raced up the Larksville Mountain and headed over to Trucksville.  The dentist took me back right away and started to do some X-Rays.  I gagged like 3 times because that's what I do and then I nearly barfed.

Of the 3 X-Rays he was able to take, nothing appeared out of the ordinary.  I tried to show him where the pain was coming from.  It is along the bottom left gum in the vicinity of where my root canal happened over the summer.  It wasn't necessarily the tooth itself, but the gum.  He sanded down my tooth thinking that my bite was off.  The adjustment did feel slightly better, but there was still pain.  And then that was it.  He lifted me back up from the chair and told me I needed to go to a specialist.  He referred me to (what I'm guessing) one of his other buddy dentists in Forty Fort.  I was referred for 2:30pm and they were nice enough to make a cleaning appointment for Friday the 13th.  LUCKY ME.

I headed back home to kill some time in the interim, and headed back out.  I was honestly scared shitless at this point.  The root canal experience was HELL, and that was with a bunch of gas and Novocaine, and I still felt every thing that was going on.  The new dentist, who specializes in only root canals, was extremely nice and caring.  He wanted to know who did my root canal – was it Dr. Asshole or "Jamie".  Jamie?  I didn't feel right calling my dentist by a pet name.  I shook my head and he said "Jamie?".  And feeling backed into a corner about the name, I finally said "Yes, Jaime."  He took 3 more X-Rays (my head is going to glow in the dark tonight!) which were as equally gag-inducing as the last set that were taken at Jamie's office.  The new specialist has an advanced X-Ray machine apparently, and he was able to tell right away that something was not right….and with the root canal tooth like I had thought.

It turns out, there is an abscess beginning to form directly under where the last root canal was.  It's becoming infected.  He tested this by pressing and wiggling my tooth and gums back and forth.  I nearly went through the ceiling.  YEAH OW.  YOU FOUND IT, NOW CUT IT OUT.

After spending nearly 600 dollars on my last root canal, I decided that when I got my new job I would opt for the secondary dental insurance as a back-up to my husband's existing policy.  His insurance kind of sucks and doesn't cover much apparently.  I flashed the two insurance cards like a champ and after their calculations this root canal should cost at most 50 dollars out of pocket.  WINNING.  However….he doesn't have gas in his office.  He numbs up the tooth and surrounding areas and that's it.  When he told me that, I was ready to cry right on the spot.  I barely made it through the last root canal, how am I going to make it through this one.  Can't they knock me out?  Hit me in the head with a rock?  A brick?  I'll even sign a waiver in my own blood that I won't sue.  Just please god, I do not want to be conscience for that again. 

At any rate, the root canal round #2 is scheduled for Wednesday at 11:30am.  Kill me now. 

In the meantime, the new specialist assigned me some super-duper hulk strength steroids.  I'm not really sure what the theory is behind this.  He says that it will help calm the tooth down so that it won't be uncomfortable to work on Wednesday.  I have been reading online about these little pills (six of which I have to take by the end of tonight).  Hooo boy.  I'm in for a fun week.  Side effects include:  Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue); bloody, black, or tarry stools; changes in body fat; changes in menstrual period; chest pain; fainting; fever, chills, or sore throat; increased hunger, thirst, or urination; mental or mood changes; muscle pain, weakness, or wasting; seizures; severe nausea or vomiting; slow wound healing; stomach pain; sudden, severe dizziness or headache; swelling of the feet or legs; tendon, bone, or joint pain; thinning of the skin; unusual bruising or bleeding; unusual skin sensation; unusual weight gain; vision changes or other eye problems; vomit that looks like coffee grounds.

I'm really excited about the coffee grounds vomit especially.  I guess it is to be expected when you are on a drug that has "meth" in the name.  Methylprednisolone to be exact.  Gesundheit!

I didn't sneeze.  Oh wait, it must be the mental or mood changes kicking in.  The voices in my head are carrying on a conversation.

I headed over to CVS after all of that to pick up my prescription and found out that my husband's health insurance policy was canceled.  What the .. … .. . ???  Apparently, someone at the company decided to conveniently "forget" to send in the check to Blue Cross.  This happened yesterday when he stopped by to pick up the prescriptions that Doc Hollywood a.k.a. "Jamie" called in.  The company assured us that it was taken care of.  Guess what?  It wasn't.  I had to pay double what I normally would for the scripts.  The HR person said that we are able to expense whatever expenses were not picked up by the insurance for the medications.  Gee ya think?  Needless to say I was not pleased, and still am not.  Good thing I wasn't in a major car accident or something and need to be admitted to the hospital. 

"SORRY, Mrs. Davies, I know you are dying, but your insurance card is coming up expired.  We're going to have to wheel you out into the street until this issue gets resolved with the insurance company."

"Over my dead body you will….oh wait…."

There are the voices again.

I guess I should probably lay down and get some rest.  Today sucked. 


I'll be posting my Blog Fest recap tomorrow hopefully.  As usual, I'm the last one.

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Black Friday 2011 Recap

By M Davies   /     Nov 29, 2011  /     Events, Family, Medical Issues  /     2 Comments

I know everyone hates me and will throw things at me for posting that I went Black Friday shopping this year, but oh well.  I've been going Black Friday shopping every year for as long as I can remember with my Grandmother, Aunt and Mother.  It's kind of a sick and twisted Thanksgiving family ritual.  We put the fun in dysfunctional.

This year, our Black Friday actually started on Thursday evening…at 7pm to be precise.  The players:  My Mom, My Aunt and me.

Stop 1:  Toys R Us in Wilkes-Barre

They opened at 9pm on Thursday evening.  We got there early and found parking without a problem.  We then stood in line for approximately 90 minutes.  Toys R Us would only let in so many people at once due to the fire code occupancy regulations.  We got into Toys R Us easily enough, it was getting out that was the problem.  They had the store blocked off with various shelves, so you could only go into certain sections if you wanted to checkout.  The checkout line wrapped around the store.  Thank god I didn't have to buy anything!  Here's a picture of the line wrapped behind Toys R Us:

Stop 2:  Wal-Mart in Wilkes-Barre Township

I specifically recall a TV commercial from Wal-Mart that said "Don't stand outside in line, come inside where it's warm."  Yeah, not so much.  By the time we got to Wal-Mart (around 10:00pm), every parking spot in the parking lot was taken and two lines formed outside at each of the entrances to the store.  My Mom dropped of my Aunt and I to get in line while she tried to find a parking spot.  And, when I said every parking spot was taken…I literally mean, every parking spot was taken.  People even resorted to parking in nearby restaurants, hotels and quadruple parking (forget double parking)!  My Mom eventually found a spot, where no one else parked….BECAUSE A GLASS BOTTLE WAS SMASHED ALL OVER THE PARKING SPACE.  So what does she do?  Pulls in, and parks it.  I'm like "Well, at least we are at Wal-Mart if we need to buy a can of fix-a-flat."  I received a text message from a friend that told me that Wal-Mart was "at capacity" and the police made them lock the doors because of fire code regulations.  There was security standing at the door letting in people only as others were exiting the store.  After waiting around for about 20-25 minutes, we all finally got in the door.  The Wal-Mart commercial was chalk full of lies.  Here's a picture taken from the line at Wally World:

Wal-Mart has THE WORST setup for Black Friday that I've ever seen.  They have doorbusters, some started at 10pm, some started at 11pm and some started at midnight.  However, all of the electronics were at midnight.  If you wanted any of the electronic items, you needed to get a ticket and stand in a line which is nice because it makes it fair for everyone.  I'll give them that.  But here's what I really want to know:  How do they expect people to leave the building to make room for the others coming in if all of the specials start in 2 hours.  You have to stand in line for 2 hours to get something…therefore no one is leaving the store.  If no one leaves the store, no one else can get in.  I guess I'm the only person that is missing the logic in this setup.  Why not start the deals ALL AT THE SAME TIME?  Does an hour really make that big of a difference between the specials?

My aunt wanted a 13" TV that cost 98 dollars.  Both her and I got a ticket and stood in the line.  We had the third ticket issued for this item.  Once we got to the area of the store where the line was, we decided to sit on the floor and wait for midnight.  OH MY GOD.  You'd think we had just committed a mortal sin.  The Wal-Mart lady who was assigned to watch our line yelled at us and told us we were not permitted to sit on the floor because we could be trampled.  I looked around at the other people in line with us.  Two old ladies were in line with us.  Yeah, I'm sure Grandma will take us out with her Hoverround if we're not careful.  Are ya kidding me?  Meanwhile, we watched people walk past us with printers, computers, DVD players, freezers, and other "big ticket items" in their carts, but yet we have to wait until midnight to get a fucking 99 dollar no-name brand TV.  Makes perfect sense to me! 

Anyway, we people-watched for the next hour while waiting for the stupid TV.  Can I just ask….what the hell is wrong with people?  Do they not think about what they are wearing before leaving the house?  If your shirt doesn't cover your beer gut, don't wear it.  I think your jammies are adorable and all, but I don't think they are appropriate to wear in public.  Finally midnight arrived and we got the TV with no issues.  There was no trampling.  The line moved in an efficient and orderly manner.  By the way, I was up to Wal-Mart earlier today, and check this out: 

Look at how many fucking TVs are there now and at the same price!  Why does God mock me?  I'm debating on whether or not to sue Wal-Mart to get the 2 hours I wasted of my life in line back as well as other punitive damages.

Stop 3:  Target in Wilkes-Barre Township

All told, I'd say we got to Target around 1am.  Parking was no issue, because at that point they were already open for an hour.  Once again, here's another place that was easy to get into, but IMPOSSIBLE to get out of.  I forget who was going for what at this store, but I ended up walking out with a cheap DVD, a bottle of lemonade, earbuds and a tube of facial cleanser.  4 items, 30 dollars and 90 minutes of following the leader in the line maze that started way over in the frozen food section and we were finally on our way to our next destination.

Stop 4:  Kohl's in Wilkes-Barre Township

We got here about 3am.  We parked right up front and got right in.  There was hardly anyone shopping in the store…know why?  BECAUSE THEY WERE ALL STANDING IN LINE.  Don't get me wrong, every register had a person working at it, but it was the person at the beginning of the line directing people that was clueless.  They would make it so that only one person would go to one line at a time.  Wow.  Why not stack each line with 3 or 4 people to get things moving?  Why does it have to be so nitpicky?  I got all the way up to the check out and realized I didn't have my wallet.  Thus, my first panic attack of the evening began.  I figured I had left it at Target, or it was stolen or I dropped it somewhere.  Then I started thinking about all of the credit cards and ID that was in there and started hyperventilating.  My Mom tried to steer me in the direction of her car to check the back seat.  Yeahhhhh, it was back there.  Apparently, it fell out of my purse and I hadn't noticed.  Who can keep track of these complicated details when you've been up for close to 24 hours?  I took my wallet back inside and paid and left feeling like a big embarrassed dumbass.  Oh by the way, I seriously considered buying these shoes:

I get distracted by shiny things.

Stop 5:  The Mall / JC Penney's

At this point, I could not be more thrilled to see the sight of the Wyoming Valley Mall.  We rolled in here at 4:30, and my iPhone's battery was completely dead.  Twitter was keeping me entertained, so I had to figure out a way to charge the battery.  I took a walk down to FYE which did not have any iPhone battery chargers that would work for my purpose.  I needed an emergency charger.  The AT&T store did not open until 5am, so I had to kill some time.  I decided to walk around in Spencer's because I noticed that they had some funny hats.  I ended up buying one.

Also, did you know that they make Pacman Snuggies?  I had to take a picture to show to my friend Brian, because he'd never believe me.

Finally, the AT&T store opened and I was able to purchase the most awesome charging device known to man.  It's called the Mophie Juice Pack.  It's a charging phone cover.  Instead of charging your iPhone, you charge the cover essentially giving you double battery life.  You can check out more about it here if you are so inclined.

Stop 6:  Toys R Us in Wilkes-Barre

Yep.  At around 7:30am we went back to Toys R Us, because going once wasn't enough abuse.  This is the part where I began to get irritated with my Mom.  She wanted to buy Gabby and Owen something each for Christmas and Gabby's birthday.  Fine.  But, I don't know what to tell her to get because Gabby lost her wish lists.  She kept asking if she should get this, or get that.  I DON'T KNOW.  JUST PICK SOMETHING AND GET IT.  I was less than amused.  We were in Toys R Us for what seemed like an eternity.  I was seriously considering committing suicide with a nerf gun. 

Stop 7:  K-Mart

After the hell that was Toys R Us part deux, we made a pitstop at Dunkin Donuts to have a quick breakfast.  We couldn't go to the one near the mall because there was no where to park, so we stopped at the on on 309 by K-Mart (after the big cow).  The girl behind the counter screwed up my order three times over.  I mean really, how hard is it to get a sausage sandwich and a coffee wrong, but I digress.  According to my Foursquare, we got to K-Mart at 952:am.  K-Mart was pretty busy, but nothing like Wal-Mart or Toys R Us.  We had no trouble finding parking or getting checked out here.  I didn't buy anything, but my Mom did.  I forget what.  She was also picking up stuff for people she worked with so it may have been for one of them.  She's nuts.  I found these rejected gifts for your the special people on your Christmas list this year:

A Santa Thong, with free included Santa Sack.  I laughed so hard when I seen this (probably because I was punch-drunk due to lack of sleep).  How can you go wrong when you are getting Santa's sack free with this purchase?  You know what I say, if its free its for me!!!!  Anyone who's on my "naughty" list this year will be getting one of these.

Come on, is this for real?  It can't possibly be real.  A THREE WOLVES SHIRT IN MY LOCAL K-MART.  This is almost too much for my giddy geek heart to handle.  By the way, if you aren't getting the geek reference on this, then you need to check out this: – Read all of the comments, from top to bottom.  You will piss your pants with laughter.  I think I originally learned about this from Slashdot.

Stop 8:  Boscov's in Downtown Wilkes-Barre

You know, I love me some Boscov's.  If I ever met Al Boscov in person, I'd probably pinch his cheeks.  At around 11:15am we rolled into the parkade at Bosco's.  We headed for the curtain section first which is on the 4th floor.  I sat down on the floor, indian style and waited while my Aunt and Mother perused the selection.  I was just there last month, and didn't feel like looking through everything again.  Yeah, sitting in the curtain section.  I am a rebel. 

Something you should know about Wilkes-Barre Boscov's….in case you have never been there before, know that it is hotter than the surface of the sun inside of that building.  Do not bring a coat.  I don't care if it's 35 degrees below zero outside.  Do not bring in a coat, trust me.  You will melt.  On Black Friday, the temperature of Boscov's seemed ok.  However, I found out something new.  The lower the floor, the hotter the temperature.  It's like taking the escalator to hell if you go down to the basement.  We spent most of our time in the basement, because that's where all of the kitchen crap, toys and savings auditorium are located.  I just about damn near had a heat stroke.  I didn't bring my coat, but I was wearing a light sweater layered under a tank top.  MISTAKE.  I found a new toe ring!

My Mom was feeling ill after that, so this was our last stop, we drove back to my Grandmothers, and I drove home after that.  This was around noon.

The damage:  I figure I spent about 150 on stuff I probably didn't need.  I got a few Christmas gifts.  We shopped for close to 18 hours.  I was awake for roughly 32 hours. 

Also, I think that all of the walking and activity injured my foot.  I woke up writhing in pain and couldn't feel the toe and outer step of my left foot.  I thought for sure I was having a stroke or the diabetes grim reaper was coming to pay me a visit. 

Cue late night, Black Friday-related panic attack #2 (this happened on Sunday evening).  As soon as I was able to, I called the doctor in the morning.  After looking over my foot and poking and prodding around, he determined that I have pinched nerve somewhere in the left part of my left foot.  There apparently is no magic cure for this.  Basically, you just have to wait it out.  Let me just tell you….I'm not happy about this.  I'm ready to call for a second opinion.  Like, I know my pinky toe is physically there, but I can't feel it.  All I feel is numbness and tingling.  It's not a fun time.  At all.

Still in all, I look forward to the Black Friday adventures again next year. 

I must be crazy.  But between me and you, all of the good people are.

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The dental fiasco

By M Davies   /     Aug 14, 2011  /     Medical Issues  /     3 Comments

Has anyone ever had an abscessed tooth?  If you have answered yes, let me cut you off and say, god bless your soul.  That was truly the most pain I've been in for quite some time.  And I've already had my wisdom teeth removed, been through childbirth (twice), and had a broken ulna. 

I truly despise going to the dentist with a passion, even for cleanings.  I have this horrible gag reflex (for which I have no explanation or really know why it happens) and depending on the hygienist and how gentle/forceful he or she is; some cleanings are worse than others. 

Just to give you an example:  On the Official Michelle Scale of Anxiety for Medical-Type Procedures this is how going to the dentist ranks (#1 being the worst, #10 the best). 

  • 1.  The Dentist
  • 2.  Bloodwork
  • 3 – 9. Everything else
  • 10.  Childbirth

That's right, it is a very scientific scale.  I'd rather go through child birth a third time than go to the dentist any day of the week.  In addition to my anxiety for dental procedures and the gag reflex thing, I also suffer quite frequently from vasovagal syncope.  That is the fancy schmancy medical term for fainting.  If I get upset/anxious enough I will go down like a ton of bricks.  I have had this happen to me 3 times in my life, 2 of which occurred during bloodwork in addition to a number of "close calls".  Sometimes I'm able to control the fainting, but sometimes I can't and will faint not realizing it until I'm being wheeled to the ER on a gurney.  The time before last that I went to my usual dentist, I nearly fainted in the chair after the cleaning was over.  Luckily, that was one of the times I was able to control it. 

So there is your background.  Then around comes July 19th…i.e. my parent's anniversary.  The day started out fairly normal, and then after lunch i started getting this shooting pain in the back of my mouth on the left side.  I took 2 of my co-workers ibuprofen and hoped for the best.  I do get some aches and pains in my teeth from time to time and they usually pass within a few hours or over night.  Not this time…after a few hours the side of my face was throbbing.  I could actually feel it pulsing.  The pain became the only thing I could think about.  It consumed me.  Around 3pm, I called my usual dentist, who I now refer to as "Dr. Asshole", to see if I could schedule an emergency appointment.  They were unable to take me in on the same day, but did call in a script for vicodin for me.  The only open appointment was the next day at 11am…and he was triple booked because he was going on vacation the following week.  What could I do?  I took the appointment and accepted the fact that I would be losing pay for the next day (since at that point, I was still in a probationary period with the new job).  Since I had class that evening, I went and picked up the vicodin, popped one and again…hoped for the best.  It was a long two hours and I was starved by the time I got out. 

Eating was a joke.  All I could think about attempting was liquid.  I got a water and a chicken rice soup from the chinese place near the school.  I took another vicodin….I was FLOATING.

I woke up the next morning again hoping that the pain was gone.  It wasn't.  In fact, it got a little worse.  Popped another vicodin.  I felt it kick in, but I still felt the pain and throbbing through the pina colada cocktail of meds.  I got dressed and headed for the dentist.  At Dr. Asshole's office, there is one hygienist that I really like and one that I really hate.  Of course I got the one that I really hate…the sadist that has a picture of an english springer spaniel (which looks exactly like my parents dog) on her shelf.  She wanted to get an X-Ray.  Fine.  Except for the fact that she shoves this thing in my face with such force that I nearly saw stars from the pain of it touching the infected tooth and then I nearly puked from my gag reflex.  Instead of giving me a minute to compose myself, she tries to shove it in my face again.  Then I start to remember that  she's the one who asked if I was pregnant the last time I showed up and I start to resent her a little bit more.  At that point she gets pissed off and retorts "Ugh.  You're just going to have to wait for Dr. to take the X-Ray".  Meanwhile, Dr. Asshole is in the stall next to me, apparently torturing giving a filling to a young girl.  Let me just tell you that hearing a child scream at the top of their lungs for a half hour is not a reassuring feeling right before you are getting a dental procedure. 

Dr. Asshole finishes up with her and walks in and says "What's going on Michelle?" I started telling him about the pain I was in, he starts probing in my mouth to see where it was.  Then he and the hygienist conspire against me and both some how manage to get the X-Ray before I feel like I'm going to puke my guts up (more on that later).  He looks at it and tells me it doesn't look like anything is wrong.  Huh?  I'm like well I'm dying.  And he says well, it sounds like nerve pain, I'm going to numb you up.  Huh?  How about explain to me what the hell you are doing before you start shoving stuff in my face?  And then I made the mistake of asking if I could be knocked out to do whatever he was doing and he nearly flipped a shit.  He basically kicked me out and told me to go and see this other dentist, a sedation dentist, and he'll be able to help me further….but in the meantime here's a script for an antibiotic and good luck.  Don't let it fester.

The whole thing happened so fast.  Like literally one minute I was in the chair.  Then the next minute I was walking out the door.  Not to mention I was hysterically crying because I didn't know what was happening and the pain was so intense.  I think I next called my manager and explained to her what was going on, but I was upset and don't really remember the conversation context which probably means I didn't make any sense on the phone.  I then called this other sedation dentist to see about getting an appointment.  Yeah.  Good luck with that.  The receptionist told me he was book solid for 3 months which made me even more upset.  Sunglasses on, midday, I was driving down Wyoming Ave bawling hysterically…..what the hell am I going to do now?

In a moment of clarity, I drove to CVS and got the script filled and tried to call Dr Asshole's office back to explain the situation, but HOW CONVENIENT…the entire office was out on lunch.  Yeah.  Thanks.  For nothing.

I started driving back toward my house and then thought of the name of dentist that was sorta kinda close to my house.  I will refer to him as Doc Hollywood, DMD.  Doc Hollywood looks like something straight out of…well…a movie.  Every year, his office comes and does a program at my kiddo's daycare about dental hygiene.  I had a magnet on my fridge with his number for years.  One of my former co-workers also went to him and said he was really good and was a sedation dentist as well.  I figured what the hell do I have to lose, and called the office.  No one answered, but I did leave a message rambling on about my problem.  Within 10 minutes someone from the office called me back and asked if I could come in at 2pm, but to bring my X-Ray's from Dr. Asshole.  Dr. Asshole never gave me the X-Rays. so I had to drive all the way the hell back to Kingston from Harveys Lake to get the X-Rays.

Fast forward to 1:30, I pick up the X-Rays and drive all the way back to Dallas.  I find the office with no problem and wait to be called in from the waiting room.  When I was called back, I showed the hygienist the X-Ray and she calls in Doc Hollywood who introduces himself politely and shakes my hand.  They both determine that the X-Ray Dr. Asshole took was crap and shows nothing, so he wanted to take his own.  The hygienist gently puts the thing in my mouth and gets an X-Ray w/ no problem.  Doc Hollywood doesn't believe that I have a gag-reflex at this point because the whole thing went so smoothly.  He then examines my mouth and again remarks how I didn't have any issues with the gag-reflex.  After the X-Ray is ready he knows that I have a bad dental abscess and the tooth is infected and that I will need a root canal.  He told me that he was too busy to do it that day, but will try to work me in as soon as he can.  In the meantime, the office schedules an appointment for August 2nd (i. e. 3 weeks away) to finish the root canal? 

I started to freak out.  3 weeks with this amount of pain?  I started crying again.  The ladies at the front desk reassured me not to worry, they have cancellations all of the time, and they will work me in as soon as someone cancels.  In the meantime, I go home and the pain escalates once again.  I ended up calling the telenurse at Blue Cross to see what the hell I could do for it.  I considered going to the ER.  I considered smashing myself unconscious with a sledgehammer to the face.  She advised I should call Doc Hollywood's answering service and tell him how much pain I was in.  I did and Doc Hollywood called me back and told me it was ok to take 2 advils and taking vicodins every 4 hours instead of every six.  This somehow helped and I was able to fall asleep that night.  The next day, he was able to work me in for an appointment at 2pm.  I went to work for a few hours and attempted to be pleasant while having to talk on the phone.  It really wasn't working out.  I left at 1:30 to go to the appointment. 

He numbed me up and gassed me up with nitrous oxide.  I was also under the influence of advil and vicodin.  I was higher than a kite.  At one point I was thinking to myself, "Oh my god, why am I screaming out loud like that?"  Then I realized that the noise was coming from the TV.  Then I realized suddenly that I was at the dentist.  I said to myself…"Hey!  Look at that, I'm at the dentist.  I did have to come here today, and here I am.  Ain't that some shit?"  The dental work was HELL even with all of the drugs and gas.  But I somehow managed to get through it.  Doc Hollywood was able to drain the abscess (or whatever) and medicate the tooth and seal it off.  He told me to avoid chewing on that side until he completes the rest of the work on Aug 2nd. 

That night, he called me and asked how I was doing.  He seemed genuinely concerned for my well being….go figure.  I should point out that Dr. Asshole didn't follow-up with me at all or check in to see if I got the tooth taken care of.  Friday came around and I was still in a lot of pain.  Rich called Doc Hollywood and explained how much I was hurting and once again, being concerned, he prescribed a stronger antibiotic and more pain meds.  Doc Hollywood finished up the work on August 2nd and after a few days of soreness, I'm back to my old self again.

I never, ever, EVER want to be in that much pain again.  Doc Hollywood also was able to determine that some of the work done by Dr. Asshole wasn't done well and found/filled two cavities that have been missed.  He is a really good dentist who does care about his patients.  So guess who has a new dentist?  This guy right here.  Doc Hollywood, you won me over.

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No more babies

By M Davies   /     Sep 07, 2006  /     Medical Issues, Mommyhood, The Pre-Dooce File  /     0 Comment

Let me just state first and foremost that I hate the entire medical profession.  This post will probably filled to the brim of TMI girl things (too much information) but I'm highly pissed off and need to rant. About 2-3 months ago at one of my doctors appointments my Ob-gyn and I briefly discussed birth control options for after I had Owen.  I told her I'd like to get my tubes tied and just be done with the baby making.  I cannot afford, nor want anymore kids.  Apparently if you want to have a tubal ligation and are under the age of 30 it is the doctor's job to talk you out of it.  Why?  I do not know.  Most of them are in the business to make money and are notorious for unecessary procedures. Anyway she said "ok", but in a way that sounded more to the effect of "HELL FUCKING NO WAY ARE WE DOING THIS".  She told me I'd need to sign a waiver, and that normally they do not recommend tubal ligations for someone "so young".  Then proceded to say "what if you won the lottery tomorrow?" and kept putting these scenarios in my head of reasons why I would not want to get the tubal.  No really.  I am pretty damn sure I am done with having kids thankyouverymuch.  I don't care if I was the last woman on earth and the human race depended on me to start procreating.  There is no way I want more kids.  Period.  And this is my decision.  Since Rich agrees with me, I figured there would be no problem in getting this procedure done.  WRONG.  Suddenly the doctor went from "ok" to all out refusing to do this to me.  Listen, if for some reason I lose my mind and want another child (first, smack the shit out of me to bring me to my senses) I can adopt one.  I'm sure there are plenty of kids already out there that need a good home.  Anyway, the tubal is covered under my health insurance.  The doctor suggested I do the IUD because it is a 5 year form of birth control that requires no remembering to take pills.  Also, it supposedly is cheaper than the pill (WRONG! I did the math)  The IUD is not covered under insurance and is 700 dollars out of pocket.  200 of which can be broken out into payments, the 500 is needed up front.  Right.  Let me just write a rubber check for you.  The doctor initially told me there would be no problems with a payment plan, but now all of the sudden I need 500 dollars up front.  So there goes that idea. I could try to go back on the pill, but it was giving me MIGRAINES.  I mean these were blinding disabling headaches that made me want to cry.  The only thing that felt good during one of those was going to bed or banging my head off of something.  There is no amount of tylenol or advil that you could take that would make it go away. For a person with 2 kids and a job crunching numbers at a PC all day, I cannot afford to get one of these headaches.  They take me out of commission.  I don't know what else there is left to try.  It has to be affordable and covered under my insurance.  I was thinking about asking about that birth control patch thing, but seen recently now that its causing blood clots and other problems on TV.  That's no good  I just do not understand why they can't give me the damn tubal, I could have gotten it when I was in for my c section and it would have been covered under insurance and there wouldn't be an issue.  Its my body, why can't I just do what I want to do?????? I found a quote that's rather fitting for this entire fiasco:  Kelly Osbourne –  "My teeth, my car, my vagina, my business." Anyway, I hope there's a solution otherwise I'll probably never do "it" again.  And at this point that's fine with me.

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