Into the Void

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Seroquil Soliloquoy

By M Davies   /     Jul 03, 2018  /     Into the Void, Misc/Crap  /     3 Comments

10 days of being voluntarily committed, a polarizing blog post by Michelle Davies, written on 6/29/18.

 

WHAT I LEARNED…

 

After 10 days of nonstop advocating for myself as well as my life and affairs — I learned to start paying it forward.

I mean, I really always did that, but it was radiated and magnified because of my elevated mood. And before you start getting thoughts in your head – no drugs were involved. Just caffeine and cigarettes, which now seem to be my only 2 remaining vices. Also, a GNC woman’s multi-vitamin (if that counts).

Sometimes all it takes is a little love, some guts, dreaming and creativity to put the important things back into focus.

Here are my takeaways:

  • I’m happy for the first time in EVER and I’m actually learning to smile and joke and love myself again. I remember who I am, who I always was. I missed me.
  • I woke up with the sun.
  • I stayed up late (NOT IN THE SAME DAY, PIPE THE FUCK DOWN)
  • I didn’t ask for permission.
  • I was polite.
  • I had manners (albeit a filthy mouth and mind).
  • I realized I raised terrific, well-adjusted children to which I am proud of. Each in their own unique way.
  • I cleaned, cooked, bathed, watched tv, shopped and cared for 2 children and a needy cat alone.
  • I protected them and love them alone.
  • I learned (which I always knew) that it’s sometimes helpful to rely on the help of others.
  • Talk therapy does help, even if its with your best friend or your favorite notebook and writing utensil.

All any of these took was nearly dying to realize I was never really living. I’m only 37. This is time for a new beginning. I am no longer afraid. I found my joy.

I thank my angels for watching over me: Christy Elston, George Gumpert, Jeff Lamana, Both of my Grandparents, My Aunt Sue, Frank Murgalis, Felicia Thomas, Jennifer Barzilowski and lastly, Justin Hossage.

I close this chapter on the last 14 years of my life, and look forward to the next 14 and beyond. It’s a great day to be ALIVE.

Also, this is NOT a suicide note, so just pipe the fuck down. I still carry George’s PV ID card around in my wallet as a constant reminder of what suicide does to families. Here’s the proof:

Peace.

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240 Involuntary Hours in the Psych Ward – a journal (part 3)

By M Davies   /     Jun 26, 2018  /     30 Day @Neilbytes Blogging Challenge, 30 days of truth, Annoyances, Blogging, Community Service, Family, Into the Void, Medical Issues, Misc/Crap, Mommyhood, NEPA, Quotes, Rejection, The WTF File, TV Rants, Uncategorized, Wacky PA Weather  /     0 Comment

This is a continuation of the journal that I kept while I was involuntarily held in a mental hospital on a 302 and later a 303. If you’d like to read the first part of the journey to get the hell out of the hospital, check out part 1, located here and part 2 located here. This is the third and final part in the series.

Sun. 6/17/18 8pm

Dee came to visit me today. That visiting hour passed rather quickly. I was rather relieved that my Mother didn’t come to see me. She sometimes gets on my last nerve even though I know she means well. Harold was attending a book reading and my Mom/Dad/Russell all went for pizza for Father’s Day.

Some good news though, I am leaving tomorrow. Hopefully by 1pm, I’ll be out of here. I can’t wait to shower and get a pedicure and shave. REDACTED NAME leaves Tuesday! Yay! Good for him! Maybe our paths will cross sooner rather than later *wink wink nudge nudge*. From my ride home, I will pick up my car and clothes and laptop from Swa Va. I have my Fiat ready to go to my Mom’s then Tuesday I meet with my lawyer to start divorce proceedings. Then I sail back to Sax for a few days to collect some belongings and pay my $10 library fine.

Oopsie woopsie!

My goal is to finish this book before I leave tomorrow – 20 pages left. What a goal! Let’s hope it comes true!

TTYL,

Michelle “HD”

__________________

Blank Space – Write your Name

T. Swift

Some quotes and shit:

  • “You are wonderful”
  • “Anything is possible”
  • “Don’t forget that you’re human. It’s ok to have a meltdown. Just don’t unpack and live there. Cry it out and then refocus on where you’re headed.”
  • *Did you know — in the average lifetime, a person will walk the equivalent of 5 times around the equator
  • *Did you know — in an average lifetime, you will swallow 5 spiders, but why stop there, TREAT YOURSELF
  • Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time — Thomas Alva Edison
  • When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.  — Henry Ford
  • You are enough…you are stronger than you think you are — Me
  • “Whiners go home early” – Tim Dahlberg (it was a headline in the TL that made me laugh out loud)

Messages on Graduation Caps & Gowns in the Newspaper:

  • Do beautiful things with your beautiful life
  • The best is yet to come
  • Bloom where you are planted
  • Expect something incredible
  • Already forgot everything
  • Freedom

Mon. 6/18 5am

Weather: Partly Sunny, Hot/Humid, Passing showers later

Hi: 86-93

Low: 64

TODAY IS THE DAY!

I’m coming home! Lots of stuff to do to get myself back on the grid, but I am not worried at all. I feel energized!

REDACTED NAME seems happy that I get to leave today for some reason…

I wonder why…

Such a sweet boy, love him to death.

Reminds me of that song by Iggy Azalea – Black Widow. That’s probably a poor comparison. But it’s like every song I hear suddenly triggers my memory of something that we’ve talked about or have done in our personal lives. Is that weird? Probably, but no one said I was normal ever. I heard Journey playing in the halls yesterday as we did laps and that song also reminds me of him. He keeps saying he never wants his heart broken again – I won’t – because mutually, I don’t want my heart broken either.

There needs to be trust and open communication by both parties for this to work. I think that’s why both of our marriages are or have failed in the first place. I’m willing to give love another shot. It terrifies me, but in a good way? Which probably makes no sense.

I usually trust no one at first. They have to earn my respect and trust.

My friend Steve told me that’s no way to live life. Trust everyone until they give you a reason NOT to trust them. That’s easier said than done when you’ve been fucked over as many times as I have. All I can do is try.

11 pages to go. We’re in the home stretch. More later…

XOXOXO

-Michelle

Mon. 6/17/18 6am

I though more about past relationships and other than CJ and George (RIP), I’ve been fucked over in every relationship that I’ve ever been in. I have no reason to be nasty to anyone else. I have enough hurt for 2 people.

Note: My pencil is sharpened now, LOL. Still no pen.

Anyway, I was catfished, cheated on, abused, dumped the day after my Grandmother died, and head games galore. Lots of painful memories that I don’t wish to recreate EVER. I don’t want to do it and I don’t want it done to me. Period.

I am ready to go (in the words of Republica)

-Michelle

*(drawing of the 16 logo and lyrics to the open)*

*1234 Feist Lyrics Collage*

Mon. 6/18/18 11:45am

AM

OUT

!!!!

Things I missed and am grateful for:

  • My family
  • My phone
  • My concealer
  • Ulta
  • Netflix/Hulu/Streaming
  • My Friends
  • My Car
  • Freedom
  • Happiness
  • Joy
  • Love
  • Freshly Cut Grass
  • Perfume
  • My Flat Iron
  • Real Food
  • Beer
  • Shaving My Legs/Arm Pits
  • Pedicures
  • Manicures
  • Sunrises & Sunsets
  • My MUSIC
  • Sushi

Reflections:

My husband put me here because afraid of me, but then told my doctor that he wasn’t afraid of me. I lost ten precious days with my children because of this. I, however, met an amazing guy who helped me cope with “the looney bin.” That says a mouthful, doesn’t it?

Pretty soon, I will have my life back in order and I cannot wait.

This experience has been an important one. I feel strong when I was weak. I feel weak where I was strong. Call it yin and yang.

I am finally at peace and I have joy in my heart. I WILL be okay. I cannot wait to go back on the grid.

YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

This is my ending, however god (or whatever supreme being you believe in) doesn’t close a door without opening a window.

The window is open and I can feel the breeze, smell the freshly cut grass and feel the warmth. The future is promising. I can’t wait!

Four ending thoughts:

  1. (And I’ve said this before) Don’t fuck with an #AMNewser. Not now. Not ever.
  2. You can’t out soprano a soprano.
  3. Stitches get snitches.
  4. ALL OF THIS HAPPENED BECAUSE OF DMX LYRICS.

 

THE END

(or is it …. ?)

Thanks for listening!

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240 Involuntary Hours in the Psych Ward – a journal (part 2)

By M Davies   /     Jun 25, 2018  /     30 Day @Neilbytes Blogging Challenge, 30 days of truth, Annoyances, Blogging, Community Service, Family, Into the Void, Medical Issues, Misc/Crap, Mommyhood, NEPA, Quotes, Rejection, The WTF File, TV Rants, Uncategorized, Wacky PA Weather  /     0 Comment

This is a continuation of the journal that I kept while I was involuntarily held in a mental hospital on a 302 and later a 303. If you’d like to read the first part of the journey to get the hell out of the hospital, check out part 1, located here.

6/16/18 2pm

The dayshift nurses are a bunch of Bolsheviks. In my patient rights it specifically states that I am able to conduct my affairs while I’m in here. All of my business is on my phone, which I’m not allowed to have — looks like I’m never ever getting out, all thanks to my darling of a husband, isn’t he sweet? 302ing me so that I missed the following:

  1. My son’s graduation
  2. Both kids last day of school
  3. Our wedding anniversary
  4. Father’s Day

Lovely man which comes from an equally lovely family. And when I say lovely I mean DICKHOLES.

I pae these hallways so much that I may have kittens (or at least that’s likely what the nurses think).

He’s royally fucking up my life and we need to go our separate ways. I’m over the bullshit and drama with his family. OVER IT.

I called my atty again.

LETTUCE PREY (pun intended) for a miracle or some divine intervention from above.

I think I scared away poor (REDACTED NAME) away. I suck, blah, whatever. I’m a shit person who doesn’t deserve anything good apparently. I hope he doesn’t hate me.

Time moves so slow in this place it’s like 1 year is 1 day. Thank god my mother brought me a watch. Now if I could just get my glasses I’ll be able to read up close.

I really hope some of my friends come today. 5 days of Mom is too much.

Signing off for now,

MICHELLE HRYVNIAK

6/16/18 4pm

I wonder if someday I will be telling my grandchildren about the great tornado of 2018 like how my grandparents told me about hurricane agnes’ flood. I really hope to have grandchildren some day. It’s nice to find an audience that’s captive which is why I find blogging so therapeutic…

Maybe one day they’ll read about my entire journey and document it for history books. Haha, yeah right, but at least it’s an accurate representation of my life until now.

<plans about leaving hospital>

Plan A Modified

Look for Apt, TGIFridays

Plan B Modified

Take Uber to Swa Va, get car and possessions civilly – head to Saxonburg, move possessions by August 1 back to Blakeslee while apartment searching, get security deposit back $660 and use for new deposit. Look in HUGHESVILLE. Dad and I will get stuff from Saxonburg.

STUFF I HAVE IN SAXONBURG:

  • Drawer Set
  • Some clothes, toiletries, shoes
  • Microwave
  • Table/Chairs
  • Pots/Pans/Dishes/Cubs/Crockpot
  • Some food (toss)
  • Bed
  • Bookshelf w/ books
  • Hangers
  • 3 lamps
  • Desk
  • Love Seat
  • Chair
  • TV/Roku
  • TV Stand (trash)
  • Coffee Maker
  • DVD Player
  • Tapestry
  • Pictures
  • Wreath
  • Door Mats
  • Toaster
  • Foreman Grill
  • Bakers Rack
  • End Tables
  • Coffee table

*Make a weird PA bucket list*

Blog post idea: Hryvniak Again, origin, blah blah blah currency, family I found through Facebook

WOW upside down is MOM.

(REDACTED PAGE)

6/16/18 11pm

When he’s around my whole body can feel it. It’s hard to explain. I just can sense his presence. It’s exciting. It gives me goosebumps and chills all at once. I am falling fast and it’s scary. Exciting scary.

It looks like I’m here for another day or two then I will activate either Plan A or Plan B depending on the circumstance.

Bottom line, this will be a clean break. It has to be for the kids sake and for my sanity. Successful families grow together and not apart. I’ve grown a lot since meeting him at age 19. He has not. He’s stubborn and refuses to grow and accept that I’ve grown as a person. He talks at me rather than to me – if that at all makes sense. I need a partner, someone who will listen as well as communicates.

Look, I know I’m no angel, but I deserve to be treated better. That much, I know.

For years, I’ve referred to our marriage as oil and water (or is it oil and vinegar?) Either way – we don’t mix well together. These last two months back home have been awful with him. It’s like a pressure cooker ready to explode.

Putting the 302 on me was the lowest of the low things he could do. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. He behaves just like his assinine family. I guess this is what you’d call the perverbial straw on the camel’s back. I’M DONE WITH HIS SHIT!

Here’s to new beginnings. Change to me is terrifying, but necessary for growth.

So let it be written…

So let it be done…

Signing off for now,

-Michelle “HAITCH” Dee

Visitors to Date: Harold, Mom, Dee, Dad, Cheri, Heather

Sun. 6/17/18 3am

(Father’s Day)

Still stuck in “the pen” without a pen. It’s Father’s Day and I hope R— enjoys spending it alone with his two children. I’m about 9/10 that he will get nothing from either of them. They won’t remember and if/when they do it will be too late, he’ll already be pissed.

I am awake and ready to conquer the day.

It’s times like these I’m reminded of that Rob Thomas/Matchbox 20 song “3AM”

“It’s three am, I must be lonely”

My friend Matt told me that Rob Thomas wrote this song about his sick mother. My kids are probably thinking the same thing about me. I don’t want to scare them unecessarily.

“Yeah everything is fine, honey, your Daddy put Mommy in a psych ward.”

I wouldn’t imagine that would go over well especially since both of them saw my stomach staples (not on purpose). Someday I will let them know the whole story, maybe even let them read this book.

When Cheri visited yesterday, she brought me a new book in case I fill this one. She’s so nice. I want to send her a thank you card. I’ll have to wait until the phones open up again to call and get it.

I can’t wait for NAME REDACTED to wake up. Miss him. My partner in crime.

FIGURATIVELY NOT LITERALLY

It’s so sad when you have to make that statement every time you make a sick joke in here. I’m sarcastic and love dark comedy a lot, so I say that about 3 bazillion times a day.

My suture area is super duper itchy. I’m trying desperately not to scratch it, but GAHHHHH!

I’ll quietly watch the news on 16 at 5am and think about the fun times we had at the station over the years. I miss that place a lot.

Blahhhhh whatever.

Signing off.

Best,

Michelle

PS – I miss my hummingbird and robin families.

6/17/18 5am

Bienvenidos a mi vida loca! Ole!

Weird questions I have —

  • How do you throw away a garbage can?
  • Why am I here?
  • Does the butterfly theory exist?
  • Could I start a successful vlog?
  • Who cares why the chicken crossed the road?
  • Can you pickle pickles?
  • How deep is your love?
  • I wonder how many divorces there are in Virginia (the state for lovers).

Weather for Father’s Day

Hi: 80-91

Low: 50

Hazy, Hot, Humid, Sun and a possible storm later on.

List of Noreenisms (yes, I even miss Noreen today!):

  • It is a good morning, Andy!
  • Hi Andy, good morning everyone.
  • Water your elderly (kidding, she never said this)
  • I’m sorry, Honey
  • Chiggers
  • Acrossst
  • Shades of Gray
  • Milky White Appearance
  • Peeks and Breaks
  • Today Offers…..(Happiness, hopefully)

I CAN’T COMPLAIN, BUT I STILL DO!  – MAHD

Remind me to tell Colleen about the Iron Pigs Sandlot Movie Tribute. Sun, July 1st in Allentown!

Fiat situation: What to do? Keep? Sell?

Don’t forget Macklemore tickets! Something to look forward to – July 21 in Hershey!

Check on Uhaul costs and return policy

6/17 (no time listed)

I miss my podcasts as well. Damnit.

  • Jenna & Julien
  • Babysitters Club Club
  • AMR
  • Crime One (I forget the name)

I also miss my fave YouTubers.

  • RLM
  • Pburgh Dad
  • Jenna
  • Julien
  • Pressure Luck
  • Cooking w/ Jack
  • Noreen’s Kitchen
  • Freaking Reviews
  • Binging with Babish
  • Chef John
  • Zach Morris is Trash
  • Carin’s Corner

LOL – the power blipped here and now the Circus Electric traffic camera channels all say “NO VCR” – LOLOLOLOLOL. What the ever loving hell?

For Mother’s Day, I got a dildo from R—. For Father’s Day, I got put in a psych ward. LOVELY!

*label from bottle of Nestle Pure Life water*

Purified water…from Allentown public water…..OK THEN?

More blog post ideas: Words my husband doesn’t know, aunt’s house dream Thunder by Imagine Dragons was in the basement, I can name that tune in 5 notes.

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Dave Pedri: Fun Ruiner

By M Davies   /     Jun 24, 2018  /     Community Service, Hilarity, Into the Void, Misc/Crap, Rejection, The WTF File  /     0 Comment

I had a blog post all planned out to make fun of Luzerne County roads, but Dave Pedri ruined it for me. THANKS A LOT DAVE PEDRI.

I can’t really complain, I still got what I wanted, but I STILL WILL, because you know that’s how I roll.

 

Allow me to explain….

 

Dave Pedri and I go back all the way back to 2010 when he was in my Leadership Wilkes-Barre class. He’s a cool cat, levelheaded, funny and a good listener. Fast forward 8 years and now he’s the manager of Luzerne County. As in, the. entire. county. I have a love/hate relationship with this county (my home) for a variety of reasons depending on the week and how hangry and/or PMSing I am that particular day. Dave is and has been a good friend and I hope he can see past my bitchiness.

 

My latest bone of contention is Luzerne County’s $5 Vehicle Registration Fee. The fee allegedly will be used fix roads and bridges. Here’s a convenient list of said roads for your review thanks to our local Times Leader newspaper. I’m not sure how or why Luzerne County decided to get into the road management business, but at some point, they did. It was a poor decision. I think, from what I’ve heard and what I’ve read, (I could be wrong) it was because they were offloading the burden of local municipalities. A lot of these roads are in Hanover Township (the industrial park specifically), the back mountain and in Mountain Top/Hazleton areas. Make no mistake, I do not oppose a $5 fee to fix infrastructure, HOWEVER….

 

Luzerne County is a known corruption capitol. Need I mention the names Skrepenak, Conahan, Ciavarella? AHEM. Not the best track record to say the least.

 

That is not to say the Titanic is still headed toward the iceberg. The ship may have been righted, or may be on its way to being righted. However, PennDOT is still taking $.77 of every gallon of gas you pump for infrastructure. Source: http://www.erienewsnow.com/story/37171370/no-gas-tax-hike-scheduled-in-pa-in-2018 

Hell, we are still paying tax on alcohol in this state for the 1936 Johnstown Flood.

 

AT ANY RATE…

 

My original point of this post was because I saw a story on WNEP this week about Domino’s pothole repair plan. In case you didn’t know what this was, or haven’t heard about it, basically Domino’s guarantees that if a customer damages their pizza before they make it home, the company will replace the pizza for free. HOWEVER, now, they’re making sure potholes can’t destroy the pie as well.

I, of course, laughed for about 5 minutes like a crazy person because I vowed that when I got out of the hospital, my first order of business was to go and buy a pizza and start driving around all of the roads that are KNOWN PROBLEMS so that I could get them fixed and get free pizza. I started making a list….here it is:

“Paving for Pizza”

  • Hillside Road (county road)
  • Chase Road (county road)
  • Old 115 (county road)
  • Blackman Street (Wilkes-Barre)
  • Main Road (county road in Sweet Valley)
  • Rte 115 (state road)

This list was dated 6/13/18.

 

On Thursday, June 21st, Mr. David Pedri messaged me with the following information:

Road and bridge crew just got done on hillside road. Reporting to main road sweet valley tomorrow.

 

I drove the road yesterday and today. It’s a magical dream. It’s as smooth as a baby’s bottom.


A few weeks ago, I wrote this little gem:

Main Road in Sweet Valley looks like it’s a road in a third world country. There are less holes in a piece of Swiss Cheese.

On Monday, May 28th, there is a Fireman’s parade in tandem with the annual Memorial Day weekend Fair, which is presented by the Volunteer Ambulance/Fire companies. Here’s a link to the Facebook event:

https://www.facebook.com/events/2071067353161431??ti=ia

The road is still deplorable condition. The parade usually lines up at Ross Elementary and travels down to the area of North Lake Road. As a tax payer and a parent who has to travel that road often for school events, I am CONCERNED about this. We are hosting fire companies/ambulances etc from all over the Back Mountain. It’s embarrassing, but in addition, I’d hate to see another community’s emergency vehicles have a tire or axle taken out due to county negligence. In addition, will the parade of larger vehicles cause more damage to the road?

I called Karen Boback’s Office who referred me to Larry Plesh in the Luzerne County Road Dept. He says there’s a drainage issue that needs to be addressed before the road can be resurfaced. I’m not an idiot, I know there’s a series of events that needs to happen to get things fixed up the correct way. But when you have several businesses, churches, A SCHOOL and the emergency vehicles all on the same road swerving into opposite lanes to avoid potholes, well, someone could die. It’s a major safety concern. Can they not at least PATCH the road until the other issues can be addressed? This is utterly ridiculous.

Is Luzerne County holding our roads hostage until they get their 5 dollars? What is going on here?

If you can shed some light on this matter, it would be appreciated. Thank you!

 

I stand corrected and apologize. Dave Pedri has and continues to shock me with his kindness and ability to listen. I’m not normally a political blogger and HATE HATE HATE talking politics, but the man is doing as good of a job as anyone could do under the circumstances he inherited and for that I am grateful.


 

However, he still ruined the original concept for this blog post and now I’m pissed off that I’m not getting a free pizza.

 

Yo Dave, where’s my Domino’s?

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240 Involuntary Hours in the Psych Ward – a journal (part 1)

By M Davies   /     Jun 23, 2018  /     30 Day @Neilbytes Blogging Challenge, 30 days of truth, Annoyances, Blogging, Community Service, Family, Into the Void, Medical Issues, Misc/Crap, Mommyhood, NEPA, Pittsburgh, Quotes, Rejection, The WTF File, TV Rants, Uncategorized, Wacky PA Weather  /     2 Comments

6/9/18

(My 14th Wedding Anniversary)

Morse code is not the same as pulse code and 5 million other things I learned at the phone company by Michelle Ann Hryvniak.

<research facts go here>

(I’ll come back to those later on when I’m able to use my telephone)

Telco in a box diagram drawing. Look at me. I should have been in Tech Staff.

6/12/18 – 6am

I’m supposed to have a job interview in 2 days, but I’m not allowed to go. I also have a PFA meeting.

I’m never getting out. Ever. It’s impossible, much like the Widespread Panic Song.

I have so much to do this week. There’s no way I’ll be able to finish it from inside of these 4 walls.

I. GIVE. UP.

6/12/18 – 9am

I never thought I’d say this, but I miss Pittsburgh. It’s such a great city with spunk. I miss the 28 traffic and the friendly sweet people – some of the nicest I’ve ever met in my whole life. I love the yinzer accent too…I am now able to spot it a mile away. I miss sleeping in my own bed. I miss Saxonburg which I firmly believe is Sweet Valley’s sister city/town/borough.

<reasons why go here>

  • 18656 vs. 16056 (fact numero uno)
  • History of Mihalishin Road aka Andy’s Road aka Linden Lane
  • History of Sweet Valley via curmudgeon guy (note to self: find that letter and poem about Will Sill and write about that in a later post)

6/12/18 – no time listed

My Journey – My Goals

My immediate goal is to complete my divorce and I will with the help of one of my attorneys.

Then I will finally start my dream job on 7/9 at AccuWeather. I am a self-proclaimed weather dork since birth and have watched the Weather Channel since birth. I have watched the Weather Channel almost exclusively. I collect books about weather and have an extensive collection. I have written several blog posts on the topic. It was my original career goal to become a meteorologist. Maybe if I can manage this class and overcome my social anxiety and finish school I can actually achieve my dream. This dream has been buried inside of me since a teenager – it’s time to act on it.

I’m pretty enough

I’m smart enough

and gosh darnit

PEOPLE LIKE ME

<3

Wed, 6/13/18 – 6am

(2 months since I left WQED)

STAY STRONG

thryv (thrive)

Write the story about the wedding dress fiasco with the in-laws. Explain how I was inducted into the DUVCW officially, but that it was also time change weekend and how the crazy in-laws (or as a former co-worker used to refer to them as…”outlaws”) kicked me out of the wedding and the family all because they couldn’t communicate when the dress fitting was for me – A FUCKING SHIFT WORKER.

Write a blog post about almost dying on Memorial Day

Did you know…

Studies have suggested that gifted people (much like my daughter which I birthed) often have bad handwriting because their brains are working faster than their hands. XD XD LAWLS <3

“If you want to be happy, you have to be happy on purpose. When you wake up, you can’t just wait to see what kind of day you’ll have. You have to decide what kind of day you’ll have.”

6/13/18 – 1pm

Suggested topics for blog posts: What spending 5 days in a nut house has done to me, Lee Park house origin

Reminder to call about my IATSE 820 hiatus status

A poem:

Rise

Chaos

Beginning Again

Unknown

Never cease to fly if held down

A different view

It comes back around again

Words I never told you

Walking free

You showed me what needed to be shown

Beyond myself

I will never see the world the same way

Beauty stands before you

The path I have chose

There’s one memory of us

We are all that we are

What I have I become?

When I fall, I fly

What they see

This can’t be the end

Your Soul is in your eyes

I will not surrender

Let the light shine in the darkest of nights

All these shapes and colors are so it doesn’t hurt so badly

A magic moment

 

Philly sucks!

Thurs, 6/14/18 6am

Today was supposed to be my appointment to leave to get my sutures out at Geisinger. I am almost certain that I won’t be able to. I have to do in this Tennessee Redneck owned hospitaly where many people have access to my medical records. My doctor tried to get a hold of my husband twice for counseling.

NO ANSWER

What a shock.

Just kidding.

I really just want them out because they are so uncomfortable. Not to mention, I have to run to the bathroom literally every five minutes and everyone here thinks I’m an actual nut job.

Listen.

I’m a survivor. I almost died. I was in the ICU for 3 days and the first conscious memory I had was ripping the breathing tube out of my face. The last thing I remember before that was my Ambulance ride and being rushed to emergency surgery.

Thurs. 6/14/18 7am

THE STAPLES HAVE BEEN REMOVED.

AT WVHCS.

I feel like a brand new person.

Thank you, Jesus!

Thurs. 6/14/18 7:15am

GET ME THE EFF OUTTA HERE

Please Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

“Can’t spell cheapskates without CHS”

*revised A-List*

Thurs. 6/14/18 10am

I met this really great guy in here. One that actually listens and respects me. It’s amazing that such a person could exist. After 15 years of an abusive marriage, I am finally calling it quits. I cannot be treated like a piece of dirt any longer. This has been a long time coming. We’ve grown apart mentally, physically and etc. (redacted 2 sentences)

Thurs. 6/14/18 8pm

I slept most of the afternoon and it was lovely. I was woken up by my attorney with good news (hopefully). My 401k, which I sold off, was distributed and let the games begin. I will be moving back home (TEMPORARILY) to Blakeslee and then headed to Saxonburg to get my stuff.

*now writing in pen vs. pencil*

He drained the bank account. On what is anyone’s guess. I think I have a pretty good idea.

He’s running scared now, he won’t return any of my belongings, or at least the correct ones. Not very smart.

I want my laptop and my tablet back – those will be coming home with me next. As well as my car, and of course, my children. Posession is 9/10 of the law, so I plan on fighting this fight well up to the supreme court. And I have SEVERAL character witnesses willing to testify on my behalf.

But anyway….focusing on the positive so that I can get the hell out of here.

I’m dreaming of sushi, soup, and steak…..hmmmm….maybe hibachi on my first meal out of here. Please and thank you

<3 Michelle

PS- Remember to PayPal atty

Fri. 6/15/18 4am

I had a pen that was given to me by one of the nurses taken away from one of the nurses that I was given to it from.

I am a danger to myself with a pen? Ok. What am I going to do? Draw on myself? Good gravy.

BACK TO CRAYON AND PENCIL FOR ME.

Peace Out,

Michelle

“This is one of life’s little potholes”

(REDACTED PARAGRAPH)

Why am I me? All of the signs were there to leave R—. I just never could find the courage. Somehow I found my balls and they were right here all along — on my G-D chest. This shit with the Davies family pisses me off. They are like a cult. Either it’s their way or the highway (aka thrown out of the family). I’ve been thrown out of the family 3 times so far. Third time is the charm. If I ever to talk to those people again, it will be too soon.

(REDACTED PARAGRAPH)

(REDACTED PARAGRAPH)

Hmmmmm…

I feel lost when he’s not here and calm when he is here. That’s a start.

Cant wait to get out and explore it more.

Thaaaaaaat’s all folks

<3 Michelle

JUST ANOTHER DAY IN THE LOONEY BIN

My grandmother always says “things will be better before you get married”

WRONG

they actually get worse

(On Monday)

FREEDOM

OH HAPPY DAY 🙂

-Remember how to research to legally change name and cost

-Remember to talk to IATSE guy

-Book title idea: “Dodging the Potholes of my Mind”

Fri. 6/15 (no time)

Wherein Michelle Davies calls the KDKA control room by mistake, a blog post. As I was attempting to pay up my union dues for IATSE 820 local REPRESENT, I was given 3 different phone numbers for the leader. The first one was an incorrect phone number. The second one was for THE KDKA CONTROL ROOM. Finally, the third number worked. I will be continuing my membership on a hiatus status….just in case. One less thing to worry about I suppose

Blog post idea: Patch town names

Book title idea: “Tales from Adult IV, NOT! Floor 2”

Sat. 6/16 (no time)

SELF LOVE

Our story begins now.

Turning over a new leave

Have a wonderful day beautiful.

Thank you. <3

ROLL OF THUNDER HEAR MY CRY.

I finally read my 302 paperwork.

[He’s not here and I miss him so much. It hurts my heart so much. I miss him]

I’m greatful to be alive today! Considering that I almost died on 5/31.

It’s the little things.

It seems wrong to be attached so earlier on…

…but I cannot help myself

SWEET DREAMS BEAUTIFUL

YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK YOU ARE

WALK IT OFF, DAVIES!

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12 Months in Pittsburgh

By M Davies   /     Jun 23, 2018  /     Into the Void, Pittsburgh, Uncategorized  /     1 Comment

I’ve spent the majority of the last 12 months of my life in Pittsburgh working for NEP Broadcasting and also WQED Multimedia (the Mister Rogers TV station). I have recently accepted a job with AccuWeather which is a meteorology company located in State College (home of the Nittany Lions). I guess you could say I know this state cover to cover from Pittsburgh to Philthadelphia like the back of me hand.

12 months in Pittsburgh was enlightening and fun. I learned a lot. I also learned to miss home. That being said, here are some of the WACKY ZANY adventures of the life of Michelle soon-to-be no longer Davies over the last twelve months (a photo blog). These are in no particular order, just how I remember them.

  1. I worked for NEP Group. In case you didn’t know, NEP Broadcasting was founded by Tom Shelburne in 1984 and was part of Scranton’s own television station WNEP-TV (which I used to work for). It was spun off after The New York Times Company bought the station in 1986 from Shelburne. The company took off after it acquired the failing New Kensington, Pennsylvania-based TCS after the companies jointly produced the 1987 Pan American Games in Indianapolis, Indiana.

  2. I worked for WQED Multimedia. I worked and met with the likes of Rick Sebak, Minette Seate, and Chris Fenimore. As a broadcast engineer, I maintained and assisted in repairing transmitters, satellite receivers, cameras, switchers, graphic systems, audio equipment, videotape systems, routers, intercoms, monitors and other transmission, distribution and production equipment associated with a broadcast television and radio station. WQED is the home of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. Michael Keaton, aka “Batman” worked behind the scenes on Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood. I worked with 3 of the Flying Zookeni Brothers. I got to mic up David Newell aka “Mr. McFeeley” in a recent pledge break. I set the audio for the Mister Rogers’ Stamp unveiling in tandem with the USPS folks. Additionally, I was inducted as a member of I.A.T.S.E. Local 820. I served as an audio sound mixer / engineer on the following productions: WQED Cooks, THINK!, iQsmartparent, “Hope After Heroin: The Epidemic in our Backyard,” and “Reflections on Vietnam,” as well as various live pledge breaks. I may even win an Emmy next go ’round.

  3. I had interviews at the following places (no photos for this post): NBC (as in the one located at 30 Rockefeller Plaza) twice, WPXI (the Pburgh NBC affiliate) twice, QVC (the home shopping network), AccuWeather, WROC (a deathstar CBS affiliate station in Rochester, NY), WOOD-TV (a deathstar NBC affiliate station in Grand Rapids, MI).
  4. I got to see my most favorite blog to read on Sundays LIVE. No, not Andy Palumbo….POSTSECRET. And I was FRONT ROW. It was such an amazingly positive experience, and I’d recommend highly that everyone and anyone go see the show if they are presented with the opportunity.

  5. I went to an honest to god Stillers game. I froze my goddamn ass off, but it was worth EVERY SINGLE SOLITARY CENT.

  6. I also went to a Pirates game. Far less impressive, but still a fun afternoon out. We went on Labor Day and witnessed Joe Maddon’s Cubbies get their ass handed to them. 0-12.

  7. Got to see Regina Spektor at the Palace Theater in Greensburg. Her voice is just as amazing and powerful in person as it is on any recording. Highly recommended concert if you can score tickets. She makes you feel feelings you didn’t even know you had.

  8. I saw the lovely view from the Dusquesne Incline.

  9. I got to see the Pittsburgh Dad in the flesh as he unveiled a short film. I hope it leads to bigger and better things for him.
  10. The Andrew Warhola museum. Need I say more?

    How true. #andywarhol #heart #art #andywarholmuseum #yinz #yinzers

    A post shared by Michelle Hryvnak-Davies (@mhryvnak) on

There are still several things I want to accomplish before I leave the burgh for my next adventure. I don’t want to call it a goodbye as much as a so long. I will always want to revisit this city. Here’s my Pittsburgh “to-do” bucket list:

I’m sure if I sit and think about it more, I can probably name about a million and a half other places, but this is a good start.

I’m really going to miss the city of bridges. <3

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